Always a bridesmaid. . .

Today we have our first subject. I would like to start off by saying, that even though I may have a personal friendship with many of the subjects, I shall pretend as though I have never met them. I do this in the interest of fairness and artisitc license. With that being said, today's subject shall be known as "Mary".

"Oh, sad embittered bridesmaid! Was it not enough to make a spectacle of yourself at the rehearsal dinner when you "unintentionally" fondeled the bride's father and threw up the 15 mojitos you guzzled all over the flower girl? How does it feel having snogged the groom moments before he took his place at the front of the church? After all this, are you still bitter about not finding that special someone before your homlier and slightly more obnoxious "best friend"? Perhaps some day, you'll find your match. Just remember, you'll never be truly alone as long as you have your cats."

Launch!!

Welcome to my new blog!

I have made several attempts to keep up with a daily blog, all of which have been unsuccessful. This attempt may not prove to be any different, but it's worth a try. I have yet to really decide what this blog should focus on, so for the time being it may be a mish mash of different topics. I have some ideas, but want to try a few thing sout before commiting to any particular one. Feel free to let me know what you want to hear more about and what you don't care to read about. I may or may not take your advice, but it is always (well sometimes always) appreciated.

To start, I would like to try an experiment. Send me a picture of yourself, and I will critique it. I will publicly give you my opinion on your outfit, hair, friends, environment, etc. . . I will be brutal and blunt and honest. The results may shock and offend you or could perhaps be the greatest of compliments. You'll never know unless you participate. Here is an example:

This girls name is Tammy. Here's what I would say to Tammy.

"Tammy, we all agree that 1986 was a good year, but seriously, its time to update your look. Crimped hair is for trailor park whores and cheap drag queens. There is no need to match the bag, shoes, and hair ties to your jacket. Also, your pants are too high, pull them down so they fully cover your cankles."

So who's first?